What’s brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? “Fsssssh” (only works if you say it out loud, and they know how to spell)

Usually not very long but one time there were THREE cars in front of me at the drive through ballot drop box. That was a good 20 to 30 seconds of my life I’ll never get back. Bunch of slackers waiting til the last day!

Yesterday I went to vote in person for the first time in a really long time, because I moved to a different county and didn’t re-register soon enough to get a mail-in ballot. It was super smooth, didn’t wait longer than a minute or two while they did their admin stuff and then I was voting.

Colorado, USA.

I certainly hope that I didn’t give the impression anywhere that I was anything but.

Fage 2% with some low sodium mixed nuts and low sugar dried cranberries is one of my favorite breakfasts these days. No joke.

Anything that exceeds the difficulty of a assembling a sandwich or put something on and off a grill, is something I’m gonna leave to the pros.

Yeah and I went to the supermarket this morning and they ALREADY have all the stuff out!

Same old. ‘boutchyew?

Wow, as someone who says howdy to people all the time, I’m surprised you get any kind of reaction at all other than “hi” back.

What a tease!

You’re going against your programming.

Nah.

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/in this day and age

It was pretty great. Tried to have me drive through a city park lake once to get to a movie theater I hadn’t been to before. A+

This can’t be a real product.

Driving down a stretch of desert road near Tucson, pickup truck in front of me, and we’re cruising through the wasteland at about 60. We’re coming up to a T intersection where the incoming road has a stop sign and we don’t. It’s the only intersection on this road for at least a mile in either direction. There’s a lone car waiting at the stop sign as we approach. It takes us a good 15-20 seconds to get to the T junction, and in all that time the waiting car never moves despite having no traffic in either direction preventing them from turning out onto the road.

As soon as the pickup truck in front of me is past the point of no return, the driver of the car pulls right out in front of him to turn left. He swerves but can’t avoid hitting the front of her car. Fortunately I was closely watching the whole thing unfold so I’m immediately hard on the brakes, but pickup truck driver just had no time to react. The right half of the pickup hits the whole front side of the car and it’s probably doing 50-55 when it hits, because the driver only had a fraction of a second to brake.

After impact the pickup goes careening left across the road and into a ditch, and the car spins like a top, doing a 360+ in-place from the impact force. By the time the car stops spinning I’ve pulled over on the right, and I jump out of my car to help (after making sure the people behind me had stopped!)

I check the car first since it’s closest, and I find the female teenage driver sitting in her seat crying her eyes out. She won’t/can’t answer questions but she’s breathing and sobbing and and there’s no apparent carnage I can see. I move on to the pickup in the ditch which I find has two occupants. I ask “are you guys ok?” and almost immediately feel kinda dumb for asking. The driver has removed a large piece of the dashboard with his forehead, which is now bleeding profusely. But he is able to look at me and snark out a reply, “Do I look like I’m ok?”. Well he’s alive and sarcastic so he’s probably not dying, and the passenger is conscious, so it’s time to call 911 and then try to find pickup truck driver a bandage.

I hang out to give a report to the cops, and they tell me the girl said she just wasn’t paying attention. No idea what could have made her just pause there for half a minute and then decide to go without even looking; this was the mid 90’s so cell phones weren’t really a thing yet. I would have sworn she was trying to murder the people in the pickup truck based on her perfect timing.

Far as I know everybody came out ok, and nobody had to leave in an ambulance, but that was the gnarliest car wreck I ever had front seat tickets to without being involved.

Terminator Zero was great.

Station Eleven is the best tv show ever made.

Oh no

You are correct but you can’t get away from pedants online.

I know because I’m one of them.

We’re still here.

Honestly I’d probably do the same. He’s at home, and I don’t need that drama in my work life.

My knees and back were significantly damaged by the Army and I got out when I was 21.