For some reason, none of that registered. I’m just used to knowing the format, I guess. I’ll do better next time.

You’re in luck then, debts don’t transfer!!

For real. And nothing against them, but they weren’t exactly in a position to be hoarding possessions. They left me memories and recipes, and that’s good enough.

When I worked at Barnes&Noble as a teen (~2007-2008), my coworker and I would just whip gift cards around at each other. Was a good three months.

Yeah, I get a letter in the mail like once a week because some fucking company lost it accidentally, and their penance is sending apology letters.

So yeah, monitor your credit, I guess. Just sucks when it’s credit karma or the like who lose your info.

Smedley Butler was a great American.

Sometimes I pronounced Dominos Doe-ME-Noes, to make it sound Italian.

I’ll actually use ShopRite in a pinch. I just know they’re slicing up fresh ingredients there. Anywhere that opens up a container and pulls out meat is a no go for me. But we are spoiled here in the greatest goddamn state on the world, our taxes getting us fresh meats and soft breads with flaky crusts, and a peach iced tea.

Back in high school, which coincidentally were my weed days, the state tax in NJ allowed us to do the 4.20 meal: JBC, small nuggets, small fries, small frostee. They were all off the dollar menu (which I understand isn’t a thing anymore), and came to 3.96, with 24¢ tax. It was a beautiful thing and honestly sold itself. If Wendy’s, or any fast burger joint, were to bring back a 4.20 meal, I have to imagine some young stoners having a giggle and ordering it. And then, the ingredients and their ability to tug on people’s addiction centers, do the rest of the work.

With Subway and it’s franchise system, it makes me wonder if they aren’t trying to intentionally tank 90% of the stores and rejig the whole operation, or potentially get rid of the franchises altogether. I have nothing to base this on, no education, no recent reading, nothing. I haven’t stepped foot in a subway since the oughts, and I had a chicken bacon ranch and the chicken was chewy to the point it brought back the memory of my brother telling me to get pata tacos in Mexico City.

Only works when you have local joints. That being said, I’m from Jersey, and I think we kinda pride ourselves on all things bread: pizza, bagels, and sandwiches. So when I hear motherfuckers getting Dunkin Donuts in the morning, Subway for lunch, and Dominos for dinner, it disturbs me.

Now, is there a time for Dominos? Absolutely. Is there a time for Subway? I guess you can be drunk on the afternoon, sure.

I respect you for this incredibly outlandish take. I will start saying a few but only meaning two. A couple? Could be anything. Several will now be seven only.

SOAD had two great albums, and they most certainly were not Mezermize/Hypnotize. And Steal This Album wasn’t even a real album.

I live in America and I’m good for about 4 minutes a day and that’s enough.

Trying to play red alert or age of empires and having to fill in a box for baud rate, but I have no idea what baud rate fucking is. Now we need to make another phone call and start the whole process over again.

Ebaumsworld is where 14- to 17-year-old me spent most of my time in those days. The forum was my introduction to internet message boards. Will always have a spot spot there.

So I got fired for threatening to report them for withholding employee checks. They had a bunch of 15-19 year olds closing one night, maybe five or six of us, and one of the ice cream freezers got turned off. Someone’s honest mistake, a bunch of ice cream melted, sucked, but they said okay, we’re just going to withhold all your paychecks, and I said fuck no you’re not, and proceeded to threaten reporting. In the end, me and my coworkers all got our $27 paychecks, but I lost my job. I am by no means a hero, was just a little belligerent as a kid, and it felt like a good opportunity to really dial in the belligerence.

Put a button for $1 and I’ll hit it all day. And I know that ain’t the person behind the register deciding, but if I get ice cream for my family and it costs 35 fucking dollars because that’s how much fucking things cost these days, I’m not throwing you 15-25% in tip, let’s be realistic. Put a $1, $2 option and I honestly think you’ll have more luck.

Not to old man this shit, but I scooped ice cream at a restaurant/ice cream place for 5.25 back in 2004. You know how I earned tips? I played a game with customers, let me and the girl I’m working with guess questions about your life and we will give you a free size upgrade. People frequently played along, we had fun, fucked over the owners a bit (they sucked), it was really a win/win.

I was eventually fired.