I just use the HashCode class and compare the results.

Pretty sure there’s a source generator for it as well nowadays.

That is completely incomprehensible lol

This argument just doesn’t hold up. Software written by some of the best developers in the world still has these same bugs.

Why even use a language where you have to put so much effort into something that comes for free in many modern languages.

Indeed. But everyone has different levels of ability. Again mental health can drastically increase this difference.

My advice for dealing with this is using yourself as the measuring stick. Are you better than you were a year ago? Etc.

Aim to beat your personal best and that’s still good progress.

Then they clearly aren’t attainable are they? You feel they should be but the evidence says they aren’t.

A big problem is that it’s just text. In real life tone and body language go a huge way to determining how someone means to make you feel.

If someone is disagreeing with you in real life it’s much easier to tell if they just have a different opinion and respect yours or are being a dick.

Often when someone comes across really rude it’s meant in a half joking way which again would be easy to tell in an actual conversation.

These misunderstandings lead to things heating up real quick.

You basically have to change how you calculate your worth.

You are the one who set the standards that you are failing to meet.

People with depression often fall into this trap. You set a standard you can’t possibly reach and then get upset you aren’t reaching said impossible standard.

When I get thoughts like this i try to look past my thoughts and feelings and look at the evidence.

Is your son happy? Have they done anything that leads you to believe they feel let down? Etc.

Because it sounds like the only thing making him unhappy is you being unhappy.

Kids generally just want attention and love more than anything. Things are nice but they are no substitute.

Yeah literally. This is just a setup issue.

It’s definitely not for everyone. And it depends a lot on your support network. I could pretty easily get someone to have them with a little bit of notice. I still regularly go out and away.

But that is also a kind of selection bias. Kids tend to get hyper and show off when they have guests. You’re potentially seeing them at their worst a lot of the time.

They’re also in bed relatively early so you often have your evenings free. So not much more time than if you worked full time with a long commute.

Definitely. And plenty who regret not doing it. Such is life.

100% they do mean it.

I never really wanted kids. But me and a friend had too much to drink one night and I was a dad at 22. It’s the best thing that ever happened to me. Now I’m 30 and have 3.

People tend to focus on what you give up and not what you gain. Parenting presents a huge amount of moments and activities and feelings that you would never get otherwise.

Both paths are good. Just different.

I wouldn’t trade the first time my daughter said I love you for anything in the world. Or even the first time she smiled. You could offer me any amount of money or holidays and I wouldn’t go back and miss that.

I have a good support network so I can still go out when I want to. I could go on holidays without them if I wanted to. I could buy them less stuff and myself more. Nothing is stopping me.

But I wouldn’t trade a moment of it.

When I have thoughts like this I imagine that I am dealing with a friend who is having these thoughts.

If your friend was constantly struggling with their mental health and you were trying to help them would you call them an toxic, horrible, emotional abuser? I don’t think you would. I certainly don’t feel that way about my friends who struggle.

I also try to look at the evidence. Is there any actual evidence that people feel this way beyond your own thoughts and feelings?

Mental health is constant battle and separating real life from your condition can be an incredibly hard but rewarding exercise.

I’m sorry you’re struggling so much.

Most likely about getting laid. Probably left over from our monkey days.

“ChatGpt is really good if you use it properly”

Gets torrents of down votes every time. But I literally use it a lot at work and it’s brilliant.

This used to happen when new subs opened. Most of my feed was just them.

My assumption was that as the sub grew the posts kept getting voted higher than any other on the sub and therefore pushed as top material relative to the subs normal amount of up votes.

This is definitely the answer. Bonus points for contextless clues to getting the other half.

Use your bed only for sleep. No screens for a few hours before bed. Milk before bed. Reading or audio books are a great way to settle your mind.

If you aren’t asleep after 30 or so minutes get up and do something chilled for a little bit. Laying there getting pissed you aren’t asleep doesn’t help.

Stick to a sleep / wake schedule. I’ve found getting up early and consistently much more effective for sorting out my sleep.

This one is relatively as well.

This dude is clearly looking to get laid and I bet it’s very clear from the way he approaches people. You’re assuming they aren’t creeping.

You have to trust the person you’re communicating with has turned it off. That’s my point. It’s an optional feature